We all wish we had super powers, and when we close our eyes and dream about our newfound awesomeness we see ourselves flying, being super strong, moving things with our minds, setting things or ourselves aflame. But for some the dream of being mutated and gaining superhuman abilities does come true, perhaps too true.
For every person who has a better job, better house, and better toys there are the dregs, the pond swill whose unhappy task is to live in the shadows of greatness. I’m talking about the superheroes who were given extremely lame super abilities and forced to live a life of ridicule and mockery while fighting crime alongside their more gifted peers. For every high flyer there is a super crawler with an equally single-minded or eye-rollingly lame name. Let’s explore greatness’ shadow and have a look at the worst super powers ever created.
There were a lot to choose from, so at the bottom of the list I’ve included some more heroes whose powers for one reason or another were not quite as lame as the powers in the list, but hilariously lame enough to earn an honorable mention.
10. Squirrel Girl
Super Power: Able to command legions of squirrels to do bidding
Born with the powerful abilities of a squirrel, fluffy tale included, Squirrel Girl was teased mercilessly at her local high school. She fled and took refuge in the local woods where she bonded with the squirrel population, quickly becoming their leader. She had particular connection to one of her squirrel followers, Monkey Joe, and he became her sidekick. Filled with newfound confidence, she set off to become Iron Man’s side kick. She ambushed Iron Man and displayed her squirrel-based powers, but he was unimpressed and uninterested with the teen. Eventually he did end up in a spot of bother; he was under attack from Doctor Doom and losing. Squirrel Girl commanded her army of squirrels to chew through the machine trapping Iron Man, and he was freed. Even after rescuing him, Iron Man still rejected Squirrel Girl. Squirrel-based powers are a little nuts, right?